Friday, July 2, 2010

I'vebeenlivingmylifewithoutspaces.

Spaces between words allow us to make sense of what someone is trying to communicate.

Spaces in our lives, according to our pastor, allow us to make sense of what God is trying to communicate.

The past few weeks have been a blur. I wake up, leap out of bed, and I'm onto my first task (usually studying) even before breakfast. I usually read a few verses in my Bible before getting out of bed, but the to-do lists swimming in my head are overwhelming, and it's difficult to concentrate. From the time I'm out of bed, I don't stop. School, physical therapy, work, driving for hours. Then I crawl into bed, exhausted, and start over in 7 hours.

But even though my life is packed to the brim right now, I have no excuse to not take a space. I want to be a woman who exudes peace, not stress. But peace is a fruit of the Spirit, meaning it can't come from me if I'm disconnected with the Spirit. To think that I can do it all - be a loving wife, a straight-A student, a perfect homemaker, and a good friend without spaces to be refreshed and regroup - is just ridiculous. I'm learning the hard way how to say "no" to good things in order to say "yes" to spaces.

"No, I'm so sorry I won't be able to babysit."
"No, I wish I could help you with the garage sale, but I have to study."
Yes, I'll sit in Barnes & Noble for a few minutes perusing craft books to just give my mind a break.
Yes, I'll come home to my sleeping husband and lay my head on his chest to hear his heart beat for a while.
Yes, I'll spend a few extra moments before I leave my driveway watching children learn to ride horses across the street.
Yes, I'll take my tea on the porch and take time to pray and read God's amazingly pertinent Word.

It's in these moments of stillness where the Lord wraps his peace around my heart and mind like a warm blanket. It's a conscious choice, of course, and I'm learning the great value of it right now.

The other night, I said "yes" to a dinner date with my husband. It was a rare treat and we both needed it. This man, by the way, has been amazing at supporting me. More than I even thought humanly possible. Just last night, he surprised me by driving an hour to my work to bring me a dozen roses and a card saying he believes in me. I never knew I could love someone this much.

So the other night, we both had the night off and he took me to my favorite restaurant: Wild Ginger.

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Self-portraits with my non-zooming lens... just a little excited for time with my sweet Shawn. :)
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We dressed up a little, sat outside on the patio, and enjoyed hours of uninterrupted conversation to the tune of live music and Kani Picante sushi.

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It was a little piece of heaven.

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One of many out of focus pictures of the two of us. Timer pics just work that way sometimes. :)
I hope sometime this weekend you'll be able to take a deep breath - a space - to let the Lord put things into perspective for you.

Fill your minds and meditate on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.
Philippians 4:8-9

5 comments:

  1. thanks for this reminder, girl.

    it was also good to 'read' on how your doing.
    take care, dear friend - and tell shawn that lenes says 'hi.' miss you both.

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  2. you my dear friend are so beautiful. on the outside but especially on the inside. thanks for sharing your heart. praying for you as your truck through these busy times!! i love you. wish i could bring you tea and cheer you on in person!

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  3. I know the scripture, "and a little child shall lead them . . ." doesn't exactly apply here, but over and over you lead me into places I need to be in my own journey. Sometimes convicting places, sometimes encouraging places. Always inspiring! I needed this blog today! Love you so.

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  4. whitney, praise God for you. i needed to hear this TODAY! how easy it is to fill up those spaces with all kinds of distractions... but how important it is to keep them free! thanks for the reminder. (and, p.s. your blog is beautiful!) :-)

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